When What You Need Is Someone Who Will Just Listen

Overwhelming feelings, indescribable fear, deep and painful, alone and miserable – these are the mixed emotions I can’t easily release. Where can I hide? Where can I run? Where can I find a safe place to express the unspoken pain in my heart? Who is there to listen?

I don’t need a solution. I don’t want to act as if everything is okay. I can’t think properly. I’m not yet ready to face my reality. I just want to express what I feel. I just want to release the heavy burden.

I JUST NEED A FRIEND.  

Someone who will listen and not judge me. Someone who will understand and care. I’m just praying for someone who will not force me to heal as if what I feel doesn’t matter. Please don’t push me to act immediately. I need some space. I wanted to embrace the pain even just for a moment, so that I’ll know the things that I need to let go. I just need someone who will patiently walk with me throughout the process.

Fighting is not yet part of my option. I can’t manage to think of the positive things as of the moment.  I am confused. My head is full of questions. Part of me wanted to scream, and the other side wanted to hide. Part of me is angry, and part of me is guilty. I’m just overwhelmed. I’m not yet ready to receive your pieces of advice. I just want to cry.

Just sit with me while my tears are flowing. Just be there when I can’t find the right words to describe my feelings. Just hear all my questions and stay with me until I feel better. For now, what I need is someone who will just listen.

And when you give me some time to express all my questions and pain, my heart will start to open. When the heavy burdens are released, that’s when I’m ready to hear your words. When I realize that you genuinely care, that’s when you can remind me about God’s love and grace. By then, I will openly accept the things you’ll say.