Our Job Is Not To Change Someone, But To Travel With Them Along The Journey

You can never change somebody. You will feel so frustrated when you try to transform someone’s life according to your own effort and strength. Because at the end of the day, change is a personal choice to make. Our job is just to be with them along the journey of self-development. We are not here to judge or condemn other people. Only God knows the things that are going on in their mind. That’s why, choose to stay with them as long as you can and stop pressuring yourself. Their lives are not your life. Yes, you deeply care for them, but trying to make sacrifices just for them to make changes is something that you should think about. Let God do the transformation and stop controlling the things that you can’t handle.

We are called to honor their process. Just like you, there will be moments when they will feel so confused. And when that season of their lives comes, your role is not to change the way they feel. The best thing that you can do is to simply open your ears and listen. Sometimes, what they need is not advice but just a heart that’s genuine enough to love and care for them. Just remind them of who they are in the eyes of God. Try your best to be patient. And stop expecting too much from them. They are also imperfect. That’s why, choose to surrender them in the presence of God.

If you are committed enough to create a lasting relationship with others, then you need to accept the fact that your character will be tested along the way. This world is full of broken people, and whether you like it or not, you will encounter pain in life. But God can handle that pain, and if you allow Him to move, then He will do miracles not just in your life but also with the people you deeply love and cherish. As much as you want others to change the way they behave, God also wants to transform their hearts. Let Him do His thing and stop taking matters on your own.

Choose to love them just like what God did. He never condemned you. Instead, He walked with you along the process. He never forced you to change. Instead, He chose to wait until you are ready to let go of the things that will hinder your growth. God patiently accepted all your flaws. And may you also do the same thing to those people who badly need His grace.